Their Child Is Probably Hiding Now

I'm sure we've all read those bumper stickers on vehicles that state "My child is an honor roll student at ..." Having been an honor roll student, band student and a less-than-stellar athlete, I guess I've never been bothered by these stickers, or even too much by the white trash response sticker "My child beat up your honor roll student."
But we all know that if a parent or relative wants to embarrass or alienate their child for life, they only have to start acting like or, worse, talking in public like their child or how they perceive their child or "cool kids" talk and act.
When I got in my car today, I saw that the car parked on the street in front of me had a bumper sticker that read: "My child rocks the honor roll. Martin Road Elementary School, Lackawanna." No, no, no; not now, not later and not ever will this wording be cool or anything else but a one-way ticket to a beating for the involved child. Also, the parent or parents who obtained and display this sticker have just earned themselves enshrinement in the Parental Douchebaggery Hall of Fame. Congratulations, and pick up your award and your child's first aid kit at the hospitality tent.